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Sunday, November 30, 2008

Balance your workdays

Some time, I felt that my workdays were relatively uneventful.

For some days/weeks, I may have lot of heavy tasks to complete within short notice, a few workshops to attend in a row, and on top of that, family obligations to fulfil.

If what I feel loaded is self imposed, I will revise my schedule and re-alocate time for less urgent tasks.

If it is imposed by others, I will speak up when I feel that others aren't treating me fairly. If providing others some convenient drain me too much, I will just take a break.

Establish proper boundaries with my friends is not an issue as I have friends who are like-minded. Multi-respect for one's time and boundaries makes us good friends and that is what I treasure most!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Voyage of discovery

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes
but in having new eyes.

-- Marcel Proust (1871 - 1922)

Be grateful to people who make us happy

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

--Marcel Proust (1871 – 1922)

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Courage vs Fear

Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it."

-- Lt. John B. Putnam Jr. (1921-1944)

Fear is a darkroom where negatives develop.

-- Usman B. Asif

Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.

-- Swedish proverb

Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others.

Keep your fears to yourself, but share your inspiration with others.

-- Robert Louis Stevenson

A cheerful frame of mind, reinforced by relaxation...
is the medicine that puts all ghosts of fear on the run.

-- George Matthew Adams

Every time we choose safety, we reinforce fear.

-- Cheri Huber

Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity.

-- James F. Bymes

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

-- Marie Curie

About fears

Most fears cannot withstand the test of careful scrutiny and analysis.

When we expose our fears to the light of thoughtful examination they usually just evaporate.

-- Jack Canfield

I think when one is full of fear, it is natural that one will withdraw from any new ventures or existing tasks as fear weakens one's ability to scrutinise and analyse.

It is hard to find your way out when your world is darkened by your own fears. You need some light to shine on your dark screen. With the light on the screen, you will be able to see images in your mind more clearly and fear will slowly evaporate.

What kind of light you do you need? Some look for it in books or search the net, some just need a conversation with a close friend, others find it through religion. No fixed rules, as long as it works for you at that moment.

Dexterine Ho

Monday, November 10, 2008

If it sounds familiar...

It may sound familiar to a lot of officer worker nowadays:

There is just not enough time in the workdays, from Monday to Friday.

A lot can be achieved if you stay after hours and come back on Saturday or Sunday.

The office may feel like an unusual dinner spot at first, but you will get used to it.

Off day and holiday in the office, may sound a bit odd, yet, you will get used to it.

Taking leave and going back to work for a few hours, may look funny at first. After a while, it become a norm.

Even you are on leave at home, you are clearing all the office mail and get things done before the dead line.

Working on non working days at office make you feel productive and look meaningful at the beginning.

So you have it for a year, then another year, and it never seems to be an end to it.

You know, it is not healthy for your body, your family life and your soul.

When you have experienced something like that in your work place, you will understand why some body just put a stop to it.

I have part-time teaching work/library work for over 10 years now and find life regaining its vitality and meaning.

Reflecting upon my work life in the mid and late 1990's, I know I have traded my life and time in exchange of a dream. I still have that dream, nevertheless, I am now pursuing it, in a different way!

Stop feeding adverse inner-thoughts

"Stinking thinking" is simply choosing to spend time with thoughts that cause you pain.

To feed adverse inner-thoughts with your attention is to increase your inner pain.

To keep feeding a thought after it has savagely attacked you is insane.

Yet, some of us seem to be addicted to inner-pain until the pain becomes so great we wake up.

Adverse thoughts are like magnets attracting more adverse thoughts in the same way lions are attracted to the kill.

Only in this case the "kill" is you. Thought management is such a critical skill to develop.

How can you stop thinking adverse thoughts?

It's not the thought that comes into your mind that cause the problem.

It's the thought you choose to believe. To stop feeding adverse thoughts is to stop giving them the food they need to survive and thrive - your attention.

When your attention is no longer available to them, they will move on to a weaker victim to attack.

-- Dr T. Aaron Lim

I attended a few Seminars conducted by Dr T. Aaron Lim held in TTSH, Singapore and find his advice makes me more aware of many self imposed misery cause by our own thought.

Being aware of these self imposed thought, we can eliminate them slowly and move on to something more beneficial for ourself and others!

Dexterine Ho


Dr. T. Aaron Lim, a native of Malaysia, is a graduate of St. Francis' Institution, Malaysia; College of Agriculture, Malaysia (now Universiti Putra Malaysia); Louisiana State University, USA; University of Hawaii, USA and Chaminade University of Honolulu, USA. He is a former professor at Brigham Young University-Hawaii, USA.

Born and raised in the ancient philosophies of the Orient and trained in the modern sciences of the West, Dr. Aaron has a unique talent of bridging the traditions of East and West.

He has been serving and teaching health, personal development and spiritual growth for over 30 years. As a dynamic speaker and educator, he uses his multiple talents to help others reach their fullest potential.

Along with his wife, Dehyana Lee Lim , he co - founded and co-directs "Bodhi Fellowship / Center For Inner Peace" ( a nonprofit, spiritual organization dedicated to teaching unconditional, universal love and selfless service based in San Diego, California, USA and Malacca, Malaysia.


范蠡 :











Anything you are carrying around inside of you, even good memories, takes energy to hold.

The energy that you are using to hold anything in the past, or anything in the future, such as anxiety or worry, is energy that is not available to you right now.

-- John-Roger


It is truth east or west!













Message from a friend:

SHUE T. L. 许定来
I believe that when I am feeling combative, it means my energy is misdirected.

I should re-focus on what gives me the true sense of purpose, or what gets the most accomplished.

Dexterine Ho

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Disconnect from the uncertainty

Most people nowadays have or face challenging situations in their work, day in and day out.

To switch and enjoy a peaceful and secure mood, just do some short reading (like quotations) , or watching a video from YouTube.

Even if you are desk bound, it can be done with your desk top through Internet.After you disconnect yourself from the uncertainty for a short while, you will regain some strength to face the challenge.

If you are too tired to watch or read, just taking a nap or a walk of 10-15 mins will make a lot of difference.

Recalling the days I worked in the library where morning and afternoon tea were scheduled for counter staff, I think those who designed such a time table are really thoughtful!

Even we are not counter staff who have to face different clients from time to time, it helps to have a short break from your routine task every 2-3 hours. It is good for your body and mind!

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Feeling inferior

While one person hesitates because he feels inferior,
the other is busy making mistakes and becoming superior.

-- Henry C. Link